Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Enough Crappy CGI Already


Years ago I figured out that I'd stopped enjoying most movies I watch. Full disclosure: when it comes to movies and TV I tend to be hyper-critical.
The fact that I love fresh popcorn helped me to ignore that aforementioned fact for a while, but eventually even those bags full of buttery goodness couldn't keep me from seeing that I was spending $10 then $12 then $15 and even $18 to be force-fed lame commercials and previews of movies I don't want to see, only to then try to watch a movie I probably wouldn't like over the voices of inconsiderate douche bags sitting nearby who simply do not care that they are in a room full of people who paid to hear the on-screen dialog, music, and sound effects and not their idiotic full-volume conversations.
With this in mind I made a deal with myself to only see films in theaters which truly benefit from being seen on the giant screen: great special effects, amazing scenery/cinematography, or anything with Scarlett Johansen. Everything else could wait until it was available for home-viewing.
In more recent years I sadly found that even formerly must-see-in-theaters genres like superhero, sci-fi, and fantasy films are mainly not worth seeing in the theater. Most have morphed from live-action films to cartoons. I don't remember which Spider-Man film it was, but there was one where early on the camera followed the titular character web-swinging between skyscrapers and I thought to myself: that motion doesn't even remotely mimic the laws of physics; based on where and how the camera is moving that isn't a camera at all; the whole scene is just fake and has no respect for me and my first-hand knowledge of gravity. That scene took me out of the necessary "willful suspension of disbelief" mode and I never managed to get back into the film.
Filmmakers: please, have a little respect for your viewers' knowledge of basic physics, wouldja?

This linked article gives more in-depth descriptions of the above and includes specific examples of current films.

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