Friday, April 14, 2017

"480 Minutes" - Always Wear Bowling Shoes (When Bowling)

This is a public service announcement (without guitars) part one: Don't do as I do.  This past weekend I bowled for the first time in 10-12 years.  It was at a birthday party at which only one reveler bothered to wear bowling shoes.  Sadly, that one reveler was not me, and during one approach to the foul line my rubber-souled shoes caught instead of slid.  My left foot went crashing straight down, toe first, into the lane.  It hurt, but I soldiered on:  I had pins to knock down.  I thought I'd just jammed it but had in fact broken the nail on my big toe, which in turn caused an abscess under the nail.  Antibiotics are the current course of action, but if that doesn't do the trick I will need to have the nail removed.  Looking on the bright side of that gruesome prospect, the experience would help prepare me for the enhanced interrogation techniques I am sure to endure at JFK following my next return to the U.S. from a trip abroad. Moral of the story: always wear bowling shoes when bowling.

This is a public service announcement (without guitars) part two: With all of the cognitive dissonance involved in blithely accepting the multiple 180-degree reversals in official White House policy this week (not to mention the interview in which SCROTUS said he'd launched 59 missiles at the wrong Muslim-majority country), I had to ask a SCROTUS supporter: "You realize that you're the kid on the school bus cheering on the sociopathic always-in-trouble/never-studies kid who just grabbed the wheel of the school bus and is now barreling down the street putting your life (and everyone else's lives) in danger, right?"

We should stop referring to spray-tan man as 45 and start referring to him as 180.

Meanwhile, MSNBC (and the rest) normalizes these u-turns as a mere "change in tone."  The distance between reality and such sanitized characterizations is as dangerous as FOX News misinformation.  We're doomed if we don't pay attention, hold fast to the facts, and keep the cable news talking heads from babbling us into a state of resigned confusion.

It's all pretty simple: SCROTUS and his good pal Vlad realize their protectors (High Nunes, Gowdy Doody) positioned within the collusions-with-Russia investigations are failing.  The continuing revelations are pointing an ever-clearer picture of corruption and lies (involving Manafort, Stone, Kushner, Flynn, etc.), so the Demented Duo have conspired to distract the world with military action and chilling statements designed to make make everyone question how we could have ever thought those two were in bed together.  Period.

This theory is coming from someone who was seriously scarred by The Day After as a teen, yet all this "U.S. relations with Russia are at an all-time low" bullshit does not quicken my pulse even a bit.  The bullshitter in chief and his minions are busily creating smoke to hide the fire.  Sadly the profit motive drives the U.S. corporate media, so it can't stop itself reporting on all of this in the way it is because cheerleading war (I'm looking at you Brian Williams and Fareed Zakaria) breathless fear- and war-mongering is good for ratings (i.e. the run-up to the illegal invasion of Iraq), but we cannot fall for it.  Not again.  You and I need to remain clear-eyed and focused on what is real.

This is a public service announcement (with guitars): Today the award-winning 480 Minutes show today will contain new songs by Aye Nako (Brooklyn, NY, @aye-nako), Cold War Kids (Fullerton, CA, @ColdWarKids), DBFC (Paris, France, @DBFCtheband), The Foreign Resort (Copenhagen, Denmark, @ForeignResort), Overlake (Jersey City, NJ, @overlakemusic), Warm Soda (Austin, TX), and Well Wisher (Asbury Park, New Jersey).

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480 Minutes Season 13 Episode 14

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